The first Saturday of September marks World Beard Day – celebrating things bushy, preened and on your face.
To mark the day of hair-worship, here’s eight excellent uses for beards. Some you will already be aware of, but others may surprise you…
1. Making friends
Is there anything more pure than the knowing nod of approval from one bearded man to another?
Beards like to meet other beards, it’s just a fact, and they will make you friends and start a conversation in any walk of life.
2. Thinking
Having a beard to stroke can let you ponder life’s biggest challenges or most inane thoughts seemingly forever.
And let’s face it, even those who don’t have beards sometimes wish they had one for this very reason.
3. Parading your pride
Whether your proud of your sexuality, proud that others have the right to choice or proud of your country – there’s no better way of showing it than on the canvas you grow on your face.
They say passion runs deep in your veins – so why not show it on your face too?
Tell ’em, Stoke City footballing fan Hairy Potter…
Get it, Hairy Potter? And Stoke are known as the Potters? It’s seriously what he’s known as, look it up.
Moving on…
4. Eating noodles
Getting food stuck in your beard is one thing, but this guy takes it to a whole new level.
If you’ve got the beard to make a bowl, make it happen – as soon as possible.
5. Waggling
A difficult and delicate art beautifully mastered by the man above.
Entertain kids – or just yourself in the mirror.
6. A prop for your frustration
If you’ve not seen Quentin Tarantino’s Kill Bill films then you may not have seen this angry looking fella before, but as you can see he’s mastered the sassiest of beard moves.
7. Awesome stop-motion videos
A good camera, a shaver and a hairy person is the recipe for some of the most mesmerising footage on the Internet.
Alternately, with a lot of time, beard growth can be just as fascinating.
8. Getting whatever you want
Remember to do whatever somebody with a better beard tells you to do today. #worldbearddayrules #WorldBeardDay
— World Beard Day (@WorldBeardDay) September 2, 2017
Finally, all there is to say is that it’s World Beard Day.
According to the World Beard Day website “it is customary for the bearded members of a family to relax and partake in no jobs or chores” on this sacred day – while family members should wait “hand and foot” on their bearded relations.
Beards – go forth and rejoice, for today is your day.
