Can everyone stop throwing things at their favourite singers please; we simply cannot have Lionel Richie getting hurt.
Fans chucking things ‘at the stage’ during a concert is nothing new but when the things in question are weighty projectiles and they’re thrown at the head of someone performing on stage then you’re talking about something else entirely. If you love Harry Styles that much, why do you want to send him to A&E for stitches? It’s a given that he won’t want to marry you after that.
Harry was struck in the face during a gig in Vienna, Austria, recently and doubled over in shock and pain. Sleb Safari would have had the place locked down and kept everyone on site until the guilty party confessed; even if it took three days.
A while back Harry had Skittles thrown at him which doesn’t sound so bad tbh. He’s had a tampon, flowers and chicken nuggets hurled at him in the past year which seems excessive/strange/unnecessary/all of the above.
The conversation around throwing things at your idol as they perform for you was reignited last month when Bebe Rexha was struck in the face by a mobile phone during a concert in the US. Then it took a twist when someone tossed a bagful of their mother’s ashes to Pink at her gig in London’s Hyde Park.
Billie Eilish has come out now and said WTF? What the fuss? Because she’s been pelted with things since day one.
“I’ve been getting hit on stage with things for literally six years… People just get excited and it can be dangerous,” she said by way of scene setting.
"I have mixed feelings about it because when you're up there it blows. But you know it's out of love, and they're just trying to give you something," she added, kindly.
Her final thoughts? "We get it, but don't do it."
Adele has thoughts too, menacing thoughts, and she doesn’t have time for any bullspit behaviour. She’s in the middle of a residency at Caesars Palace in Las Vegas and talking a lot about “show etiquette”.
“Have you noticed how people are like, forgetting f**king show etiquette at the moment? People just throwing shit on stage, have you seen them? I f**king dare you. Dare you to throw something at me and I’ll f**king kill you,"she warned/threatened.
As warnings go, it’s a good one, but in terms of setting the mood and creating an atmosphere, not so much. Still, from Adele’s point of view it’s better than a split lip.
Hap tip to Mel Giedroyc’s mum
This week’s hat tip goes to Mel Giedroyc’s mum, a woman true to her word.
Back when Mel was a teenager her mum got fed up with a disinterested daughter and a disused piano and issued an ultimatum.
“I used to play the piano a lot. When I hit my teens I got distracted by various things. I stopped practising the piano as much,” Mel told The Times.
“My mum got annoyed and said: ‘If you don’t practise the piano, I’ll sell it and buy a hi-fi.’ A few months later I came home from school and found a dusty patch on the carpet. ‘Where’s the piano gone?’ I asked Mum. ‘I sold it and bought a hi-fi,’ she replied. She’s a woman of her word. Full respect.”
In most houses that would have been an empty threat and the outcome bored teenage pianists could only have dreamt of. Sleb Safari doffs its cap to Mel’s mum for giving her daughter the opportunity to learn a musical instrument and when the thirst for knowledge had been quenched, selling the piano and buying something she quite fancied herself.
Steps say no to Eurovision
Claire from Steps has dashed Sleb Safari’s Eurovision hopes.
If ever there was a band built for Eurovision it was Steps but Claire says no, non, nein.
She knows what people are saying but she’s not convinced.
“Everyone says ‘You’d win it’. I’m not entirely sure that we would,” she told Steph’s Packed Lunch on Channel 4.
“The actual Eurovision people have never asked us so I’m kind of on the fence. I’ve said no, I’ve said maybe, I’ve said I just don’t know.
“I feel like it’s the kiss of death. You just don’t know though, Sam, one year he came second and then Mae, bless her, came second last so you just don’t know, I’m too old to risk it.”
Come on Claire, get the band to sign up and we’ll all count you in. 5, 6, 7, 8…
