The mother of a man who died after buying dangerous drugs on the dark web has spoken of her grief and urged others to seek help.
Jay Woolsey, 33, from Portadown, struggled with his mental health and was found dead at his Tandragee Road home in August last year.
An inquest later confirmed his death was linked to Nitazenes, which are synthetic opioids. A coroner previously warned that the drugs are hundreds and thousands of times more potent than fentanyl.
In England, there were 195 deaths involving Nitazenes registered in 2024, almost four times higher than the number registered in 2023.
Speaking at her home, Jay’s mum, Gillian McCann, told The Irish News the grief “hit like a freight train”.
She said: “It’s been life-changing in the most horrible way.
“I couldn’t go back to work. I turned 55 last year. I had planned to take some of my retirement early. But I had a son married and a son buried in one year.”
She described Jay as “larger than life”.
“Everyone adored him. He was charming, funny, and a good-looking lad, but he had a shyness to him. That’s why I believe that he did drink too much and dabble with drugs.”
Ms McCann said that Jay had sought help and wanted to overcome his struggles. But, she said, he didn’t realise the strength of the drugs he was taking and didn’t get the chance to complete his recovery.
“We were at a time when there was a lot of hope. He was engaging with counselling and had been trying to make his life better. Unfortunately, it wasn’t to be. I had no clue about Nitazenes, and he didn’t either.
“I do know that there is no way Jay wanted to die. He wanted to be the one who would come out of this, with the story, and say ‘I was that guy’, that’s where his heart was. He just couldn’t get there.”
After speaking with other bereaved mothers, and realising their “shared trauma”, Ms McCann set up a support group.
She said: “I’m not a counsellor, there were no strict rules, other than we were going to help each other and talk about our losses. There are 22 mummies now. Twenty of them have lost sons, and two have lost girls.”
With most mums in the group losing sons, Gillian realised how deeply boys and men can struggle.
She said: “There are three ways these boys usually die in our group: accidental drug death, suicide, and car crashes, that’s our boys. It tells me that there are so many boys and men that just can’t cope with things, and they’re just that way, a bit more reckless.
“We shouldn’t have any shame at all. At the start I thought, ‘why couldn’t Jay get knocked down by a bus, why did it have to be this? This is dirty and seedy’, but that is just pride. I did my best for Jay. I know I tried everything.”
She urged other parents to be aware of the dangers of lesser-known drugs, and for those suffering from addiction or mental health issues to seek help.
She said: “Be aware there is all sorts of drugs going out there. Sometimes when you’ve got a child and they are letting you down or breaking promises, families back off. You can’t ever do that. The door always must be open.
“Jay didn’t die of a drug; he died of mental health problems. When you struggle you reach to anything. It’s going to be the fight of your life to get away from that addiction. Your life is worth that sort of fight.”
