Go mbeannaí Dia daoibh agus bhur gcéad míle fáilte isteach chuig the Bluffer’s Guide to Irish.
We’ve been skipping along the Yellow Brick Road of life in the past few columns. passing the usual marcanna i saol duine - milestones in a person’s life that is the ordained way in western society that goes breith - birth, oideachas - education and obair - work followed by pósadh - marriage and páistí - children.
So we’ve got you through your teenage years without mentioning your bad clothes decisions and your even worse hairstyle choices not to mention the dorks/anoraks/Goths/emos you thought would be your life companion.
It’s tough being a déagoir - teenager.
You have scrúduithe - exams to think about but in the past, a university education would have guaranteed you a job but tht’s no longer the case.
Even if you might not have been academically inclined, there aren’t as many jobs around as there used to be so it’s hard to plan ahead for wht lies ahead.
The chances are you will be staying with your tuismitheoirí - parents for the foreseeable future, a thought that gives you and them the heebee jeebees.
The can be a lot of foréigean - violence too with the primeval urge in young men especially to show off their macho credentials.
It is a time when tá gach rud ríthábhachtach - everything is of global importance.
A boy says he doesn’t want to dance with you, the girl of your dreams fancies your mate, Take That break up - these are things than can have young people locking themselves in their rooms for days.
Acne and facial spots of any kind can lead to existential self-loathing while caithreachas - puberty is a subject the Bluffer is prepared to discuss in a family newspaper.
But hey, life can be great for young people too. It’s when you discover who you are, you find grá - love for the first time.
Ag suirí is courting and you would say tá Nuala ag suirí le Peadar - Nuala is going out with Peadar.
A cynical phrase I like is
Ag suirí lena cuid airgid atá sé - he’s only after her money.
You are as aclaí - fit as you will ever be or at least heading towards peak fitness - unless you’re a couch potato with an addiction to cream doughnuts and Nachos.
There are also many temptations in the way of young people, everything from ólachán - drink and drugaí - drugs to Ant and Dec and wedge trainers.
But most teenagers get through their adolescence with only a few scars while others make full use of it.
It’s so much easier to travel nowadays, the world is so much smaller, there are great opportunities to mix learning with pleasure.
Forget about all the embarrasing things that happen when you are between being a child and an adult and grab life with both hands.
Foghlaim a oiread agus is féidir - learn as mch as you can but make friends and have as much fun as you can without ruining your body or your good looks.
CUPLA FOCAL
marcanna i saol duine (marcana i seel dinya) - milestones in a person’s life
breith(brayh) - birth
oideachas (ijahiss) - education
obair(ubber) - work
pósadh(pawsoo) - marriage
páistí(paashtee) - children
déagoir(jaygore) - teenager.
scrúduithe(scroodeeha) - exams
tuismitheoirí(tishmahoree) - parents
foréigean(foraygin) - violence
tá gach rud ríthábhachtach (taa gakh rud ree-haowakhtakh) - everything is of global importance.
caithreachas(kyhrahiss) - puberty
grá(graa) - love
ag suirí (eg siree) - courting
tá Nuala ag suirí le Peadar(taa nuala eg siree le padder) - Nuala is going out with Peadar
ag suirí lena cuid airgid atá sé (eg siree lena khudge airgidge ataa shay) - he’s only after her money
aclaí(aclee) - fit
ólachán(awlakhaan) - drink
drugaí(drugee) - drugs
foghlaim a oiread agus is féidir(foelim a irid agis is fayjir) - learn as mch as you can