If you are getting a bit bored of watching festive television and eating festive food, comedian Brian Limond’s (aka Limmy) Twitter feed might help.
The 43-year-old Scot, who recently came under fire for tricking his Twitter followers into believing that Simon Cowell had died, entertained his fans on Boxing Day by narrating a fictional story and asking them to participate.
The comic took inspiration from Falconhoof – a character in Limmy’s call-in show Adventure Call where players are guided through a fantasy role-playing game in order to win cash prizes – and here’s how it went.
Let's do a kind of Falconhoof multiple choice text based adventure thing. I'll make up a story and you can vote for what you want to do next…
— Limmy's Vines TOUR (@DaftLimmy) December 26, 2017
You awake in a living room. It looks like you ended back at a flat after last night. There are a few people here, you don't recognise them. It's 5pm and dark outside. What do you want to do?
— Limmy's Vines TOUR (@DaftLimmy) December 26, 2017
You ask a guy where you are. He says "Oh look, it speaks". Then ignores you.
— Limmy's Vines TOUR (@DaftLimmy) December 26, 2017
"I asked you a question, mate. Where the fuck is this?"Heads turn. The people look worried at your attitude. The guy smiles.
— Limmy's Vines TOUR (@DaftLimmy) December 26, 2017
"Fuck yous looking at?"They all back down. All nice people. This could come back to haunt you.
— Limmy's Vines TOUR (@DaftLimmy) December 26, 2017
"Right, empty the pockets, the lot ae yous"They hand over their money. A guy says "It's just stupid, we'll phone the police. Just give us it back and leave!"
— Limmy's Vines TOUR (@DaftLimmy) December 26, 2017
You kick that guy in the chops. A lassie goes "No!" and you kick her in the chops. Another guy puts his hands over his face. You pull his hands away and punch his chops.
— Limmy's Vines TOUR (@DaftLimmy) December 26, 2017
You poke your arse and say that somebody better lick it or you're gonnae go spare. You give them a countdown but nobody does it.
— Limmy's Vines TOUR (@DaftLimmy) December 26, 2017
"Right, that's it, you had your chance". You go to the kitchen and get a knife. When you come back, one guy's on the phone.
— Limmy's Vines TOUR (@DaftLimmy) December 26, 2017
You point a knife at that guy's face and say "Lick my finger". He pushes your hand away and you stab his head. You stab the lot of them to death.
— Limmy's Vines TOUR (@DaftLimmy) December 26, 2017
You tell them you're joking, then leave. You follow signs for the train station, and the station you get to is Paisley Gilmour Street. Turns out you were in Paisley. The end.
— Limmy's Vines TOUR (@DaftLimmy) December 26, 2017
