At least when you receive an awful gift you know what to do with it – but what happens when you don’t realise just how bad a gift is until it’s too late?
That was the situation that Twitter user @xLiserx found herself in when, a few years after receiving some underwear as a present, she finally got round to wearing the gift.
Had she been wearing the pants around the house, @xLiserx might not have discovered their secret in such embarrassing circumstances, but that wasn’t the case…
When I was about 20, an ex boyfriend bought me a pair of panties that said “Wild Thing” on the crotch. I didn’t wear them until about 2 years later. I was working in a dentist’s office at the time. I had a patient reclined inches from my crotch when – suddenly! – it began.
— Marie Christmas 🏳️🌈 (@xLiserx) December 11, 2018
Of course the pants went off at work, playing The Troggs’ 1960s hit Wild Thing right next to a patient’s head.
🎶 Wild thing, you make my heart singYou make everything groovy, wild thingWild thing, I think I love you🎶
This played from my crotch. Inches from my patient’s head. I had zero idea they were musical.
— Marie Christmas 🏳️🌈 (@xLiserx) December 11, 2018
I knew immediately that it was my panties, as the song that was blaring from my vagina was written on my panties. I told the dentist and patient it was a ringtone and apologized profusely. It played any time I bent sideways and hit the little sound button.
— Marie Christmas 🏳️🌈 (@xLiserx) December 11, 2018
Unfortunately the hastily imagined excuse didn’t seem to go down well at the time.
I could tell the patient, whose head was practically in my lap, sensed it wasn’t a ringtone. My dentist told me I had to turn it off. I excused myself and went to the bathroom. I removed my panties and spent the rest of the day going commando under my scrubs.
— Marie Christmas 🏳️🌈 (@xLiserx) December 11, 2018
Only time I ever got less than an hour out of a pair of panties that wasn’t related to some sort of bodily fluids incident. Honestly, bodily fluids might’ve been less embarrassing than my vagina serenading a random stranger during a dental cleaning.
— Marie Christmas 🏳️🌈 (@xLiserx) December 11, 2018
Anyways, I’ve told this story routinely to my friends the last 12 years or so and I figured it was time I told it on twitter because, well, I’m Lisa from Twitter and I’m here to laugh at myself so no one else gets there first.
— Marie Christmas 🏳️🌈 (@xLiserx) December 11, 2018
Adam, we broke up ages before this incident occurred but I hope you’ve never given another woman musical panties because, dude, that’s the worst gift ever. I knew the thong was tacky but I didn’t know it was insanely tacky.
— Marie Christmas 🏳️🌈 (@xLiserx) December 11, 2018
The story resonated with people on Twitter who “liked” it in their thousands.
This…
This is possibly the best story I’ve ever read!! 🤣🤣🤣 pic.twitter.com/sZdL2z6NTL
— Jake Calder⚓ (@That1GuyJake33) December 12, 2018
Meanwhile, others had similar stories to share…
Love it! Got a pair of Happy Birthday to You socks that went off at a funeral once but your pants are top!
— PHILLIP (@phil_E_Dawg) December 11, 2018
But sometimes the simplest responses are the most telling.
oh no
— Roxi Horror 💀🌸 (@roxiqt) December 11, 2018
Oh no, indeed.