Sleb Safari: Unexpected celebrity appearances at much bigger celebrity weddings
PETER Andre never ceases to amaze. He's a man who you think you know - Pisces, Mysterious Girl, I'm A Celebrity, Katie Price, Dr Emily, nice bloke, and so forth and so on.
But then he goes and throws into conversation that he sang at David Schwimmer's wedding and you wonder what other stories he's keeping for that (fifth) autobiography.
Peter performed at the 2010 wedding of David and now ex-wife Zoe Buckman. Sleb Safari feels it is important to clarify that it was at the couple's request.
David had contacted Peter and told him Zoe loved one of his songs. It had to be Mysterious Girl, right? Was it the couple's first dance? Please say it was.
Peter shared the anecdote in his column for new! magazine.
"I know everyone is really excited about the Friends reunion, but I've actually never watched a single episode. Bizarrely, I did sing at David Schwimmer's wedding in 2010, though.
"I got a call saying he wanted to meet me, and I thought it was a wind-up. I went to a London hotel to meet him and we started talking and he said to me, 'I'd love you to sing at our wedding.' And so I did."
As luck would have it, David's ex-wife isn't Mysterious Girl's only famous fan.
"It was definitely strange seeing Thandie Newton and David Walliams in the same room, singing along to a song I never even knew they knew." What are the odds on Thandiwe and David also being huge fans of Insania?
All in all Peter thoroughly enjoyed himself at the Schwimmer-Buckman nuptials.
"It was wonderful. I actually have a photo of myself, David and his then-wife Zoe Buckman on my mantelpiece."
Nestled in among photos of his own wedding and his children, one hopes.
Peter's involvement in this celebrity wedding is not even the weirdest in the genre. That honour goes to Martine McCutcheon when she was Liza Minnelli's bridesmaid at her 2002 wedding to David Gest.
Michael Jackson was the best man and guests included Diana Ross, Mia Farrow, Rosie O'Donnell, Martha Stewart, Joy Behar, Anthony Hopkins, Kirk Douglas, Dionne Warwick, David Hasselhoff, Joan Collins and Donald Trump.
Martine was seated next to Donald Trump for dinner which seems even crueller when you remember that earlier in the day she had witnessed *that* kiss where it appeared David had dislocated his jaw in preparation for swallowing his bride whole.
Sleb Safari is very much in favour of an unexpected celebrity appearance at a much bigger celebrity wedding, à la Peter and Martine. Top of its wishlist is Danny Dyer behind the bar at Gwen Stefani and Blake Shelton's reception. Do with that what you will, universe.
Diddy has something to say about Bennifer
While Bennifer enthusiasts have been strolling down memory lane, reminiscing about Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck, and zooming in on pictures of Ben's wrist to see if that really is the watch she gave him 20 years ago, Diddy has been going through his own picture archive and thrown one up on Instagram.
It's of him and Jennifer from the time they dated, pre-Ben, and he captioned it #tbt.
You have to admire Diddy's sense of humour. Sleb Safari very much looks forward to his next move.
Motherland is an absolute nitshow
ARE you watching the third series of Motherland on BBC2? If not, jump to it.
This series deals with an "absolute nitshow", trampoline club and the school trip from hell and it's as sharp and witty as you could hope for.
If you haven't watched the first two series they are on the iPlayer and Netflix. Meanwhile, episode four is on BBC2 at 9pm tonight.
Lindsay Lohan is making a Netflix Christmas film
Lindsay Lohan's new film is a Christmas flick for Netflix and Sleb Safari loves the premise. If anything, Lindsay may have pitched it to Netflix and if so, brava Lindsay.
"Lindsay Lohan will star in a new romantic comedy about a newly engaged and spoiled hotel heiress who finds herself in the care of a handsome, blue-collar lodge owner and his precocious daughter after getting total amnesia in a skiing accident," Netflix says.
Sleb Safari has reserved its seat on the sofa already.