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Sleb Safari: Tripping on the vibes of life - The Beverley Callard Story

Beverley Callard: Camp Vegan
Maeve Connolly

TODAY you find Sleb Safari tripping on the vibes of life, as we enter the third and final week of I’m A Celebrity… Get Me Out Of Here!

Tripping on the vibes of life is a Beverley Callard-ism and she is dropping Callard-isms at the same rate of knots as Shane Richie is name dropping. That’s Shane Richie, go-to go-karter for the stars and sexiest man in soap.

In addition to having a number one autobiography, number one fitness videos/DVDs and having trained with Arnold Schwarzenegger (*fact checking still to take place), Beverley is the camp vegan.

Sleb Safari has traditionally been put off veganism because it seems like a difficult diet to follow. And by difficult Sleb Safari means it would have to cut out lots of the foods that it likes, but Beverley’s veganism seems very do-able.

Perhaps when the show is over she’ll sit down for a chat and explain what is and isn’t in the Bevelery Callard tripping on the vibes of life brand of veganism.

Beverley had an impressive foot in mouth incident last week when she defined Splash as “the most stupid programme ever”, not knowing that Vernon Kay had been its presenter.

“It kept my central heating on though Beverley,” Vernon said, seemingly unoffended. Days later Beverley chose Vernon as the campmate she wanted to send to the spa so all is forgiven.

Foot in mouth hasn’t been the only health concern in camp. There was a major outbreak of “that’s not my job” too. The campmates couldn’t cook breakfast until they had a clean pot, and the pots couldn't be washed until there was hot water and there wouldn't be hot water until the fire was lit...

West End veteran Ruthie Henshall knows her job is to spill the tea about her relationship with Prince Edward. Sleb Safari’s job is to give you the edited highlights: There was action in the Buckingham Palace bedrooms plus a trip to Balmoral involving “Diana, the queen, Margaret, the queen mother, Charles, Edward, myself".

At one point Charles was mixing Martinis for Ruthie when "the queen and Margaret start singing a hymn and Diana goes, 'Sing us a song!' Margaret then goes, 'Yes sing us a song from that show you're in'”. And so Ruthie sang I Dreamed A Dream from Les Misérables, half cut.

That is one episode of The Crown we’d all watch.

Ruthie shared some of her razzle dazzle with the camp when she taught them the routine to All That Jazz, from Chicago. The campmates weren’t half bad but we already knew they were a musical bunch because after the ‘lords’ were rewarded with a banquet for winning their trial they treated the others to the Frog Chorus of flatulence.

Truly, what a gifted gaggle of celebrities they are.

  • If you missed last night's episode of I'm A Celebrity here's a recap

The campmates perform All That Jazz from Chicago, led by Ruthie Henshall. Picture from Twitter

 

 

Noodles the dog is a worthy winner

Noodles the dog

CONGRATULATIONS to Noodles the dog on her success at the Mars Petcare Comedy Pet Photography Awards.

Noodles took first prize for being the most gorgeous of gorgeous girls. She’s a rescue dog and her owner said she’d donate a portion of the £3,000 prize to an animal rescue cause.

The runners-up included Basil the cat, who Sleb Safari thinks was robbed of a joint first place spot, and a yawning rabbit.

Basil the cat. Picture by Malgorzata Russell/Mars Petcare Comedy Pet Photography Awards/PA Wire 

Drama Queen - an unnamed rabbit having a stretch and a yawn. Picture by Anne Lindner/Mars Petcare Comedy Pet Photography Awards/PA Wire 

 

And that's a wrap on Line of Duty series six

LINE of Duty series six has officially finished filming and the BBC has confirmed that it’ll be on our screens before the end of March 2021.

Kelly Macdonald is the guest series lead and plays DCI Joanne Davidson who is described as a “senior investigating officer on an unsolved murder case whose unconventional conduct attracts the attention of AC-12”.

Ooh er. Sleb Safari cannot wait to see Ted versus DCI Davidson in that AC-12 interview room.

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