It is a stretch to say details are emerging of the government’s Brexit plan for Northern Ireland but concepts are emerging and the key one appears to be a sea border without physical infrastructure.
There is a comic inevitability about the argument over a hard versus a soft land border recurring at the coast. No doubt there will be similar claims of frictionless trade versus technological unicorns. However, a soft sea border is a relatively practical proposition, given its manageable security issues and lack of local residents to antagonise. A few extra cameras and lorry lanes might be needed but they can be hidden within the existing infrastructure of getting on and off a boat.
Businesses will point out their primary concern is the cost and inconvenience of paperwork, which they have always presumed would be mainly electronic. But physical infrastructure became such totem during the last stage of Brexit, it may be enough to let the government spin its way through the next one.
**
Sinn Féin finance minister Conor Murphy has told the assembly his first budget faces a shortfall of £600 million, equal to just over 5 per cent of its current total. A tempting response would be ‘is that all?’, given the backlog of demands emerging in recent weeks - and alas it is not all. Murphy’s figure is just for maintaining existing services and does not include any commitments from the New Decade, New Approach deal, on which he intends to ask the Treasury for help.
In Murphy’s previous role as regional development minister, he arranged for Stormont to cover domestic water bills at an annual cost of £300m. This is bound to be the first thing the Treasury mentions. In fact, it might be wise for Murphy to avoid citing multiples of £300m in general.
**
If the finance minister wants anyone beyond the party faithful to take him seriously, he will have to stop wishing away billions for the purpose of republican rhetoric. Asked by the DUP’s Paul Givan about Northern Ireland’s £9.4 billion annual subsidy, Murphy dismissed £3 billion of this as our share of national items like debt and defence and another £3 billion as an “accounting adjustment”, a term that covers pensions and depreciation of assets. The implication none of these factors would apply in a united Ireland is ludicrous. They all would.
**
During the budget debate, Sinn Féin MLA Caral Ní Chuilín tweeted that UUP MLA Roy Beggs had been “talking non-stop” about everything except the budget and she found his “droning voice” like “nails down a blackboard.”
This caused some clutching of pearls, with Ní Chuilín accused of disrespect. In reality, MLAs say worse things about each other every day. What was novel about this particular insult was that it was tweeted from the assembly chamber during the debate, a practice the speaker’s office really ought to issue guidance on. As Beggs is a deputy speaker, there is a good chance it will.
**
TUV leader Jim Allister has submitted a response to the NIO consultation on same-sex marriage legislation, objecting that private businesses will have no opt-out from catering to same-sex weddings. Allister claims this is at odds with the Supreme Court ruling on the Ashers Bakery case, a view shared by a number of churches and Christian groups. They would need to be careful they do not confuse the grounds of that case, which were about refusing to endorse a political message on a cake, rather than refusing to serve a gay customer.
**
A reverse gay cake scenario appears to have occurred at Queen’s University Belfast. When it cut ties last year with the Presbyterian-run Union Theological College, Queens said it had serious concerns about the academic standard of the college’s theology degree, while the college complained it was being discriminated against for having an inevitably Presbyterian culture and staff. Views on same-sex marriage were reportedly an issue.
The college has now announced it is joining the Catholic-run St Mary’s University in London, which has validated its theology degree and “understands fully our need to combine academic excellence with ministry formation.”
St Mary’s has a similar ranking to Queen's in league tables, so it seems the standards argument was wrong. Queen's has simply reached a state of liberalism where is it easier for Presbyterians to be Catholic than to be tolerated in academia.
**
The Northern Ireland Office has issued what could well be the most anodyne press release of all time, to mark the occasion of new NIO minister Robin Walker meeting Alliance justice minister Naomi Long.
“Both ministers had a positive and beneficial discussion on matters of mutual interest for the UK Government and devolved Assembly,” was all it said.
This statement is so archly vacuous, you have to wonder if it is a joke. If it is not a joke, you have to wonder why the NIO needs a press office.
