Opinion

Anita Robinson: The voice is an instrument but many of us are out of tune

Public speaking is not easy as Boris Johnson found out last week when he lost his way in a speech to the CBI. Picture: Jeff Overs/BBC /PA Wire
Public speaking is not easy as Boris Johnson found out last week when he lost his way in a speech to the CBI. Picture: Jeff Overs/BBC /PA Wire Public speaking is not easy as Boris Johnson found out last week when he lost his way in a speech to the CBI. Picture: Jeff Overs/BBC /PA Wire

No matter what your politics, didn’t you just want to die of embarrassment for Boris ‘the Bluster’ Johnson last week?

He ran out of steam in the middle of an important speech to some august body. Stuttering to a halt, his notes in disarray, every eye and ear upon him, a palpable silence fell that seemed interminable, though it really only lasted twenty seconds. His Teflon-coated confidence severely dented, looking visibly deflated and obviously flying by the seat of his ill-fitting pants, he unwisely departed from his brief and treated his astonished audience to an impromptu disquisition on Peppa Pig World. The tabloids and political cartoonists had a field day. As an occasional public speaker, I empathise with poor Boris, though one might expect more from a public school-educated and seasoned politician. Maybe he was arrogant enough to believe he could wing it?

Any form of public speaking is high on the list of human dreads. Approached on the street by a man with a microphone, most of us turn rigid as a deer caught in the headlights and mouth wooden platitudes. There are few natural orators and those who are, make it look easy. Speaking extempore isn’t the gift of many.

This is how it goes. Societies, businesses and clubs invite you to ‘do a little after-dinner turn’ for their annual bash. Flattered to be asked, I say, “I’d be delighted,” and kick myself afterwards. Now the research begins. The speech should be relevant to its audience. By the third or fourth draft I feel I’ve pitched it correctly. Come the event, I’m a basket-case, obsessively checking my notes (in BIG WRITING and carefully numbered.) The dinner is as ashes in my mouth. Coffee, and the tinkling of the chairperson’s spoon announces the unavoidable. With a brazen air of false confidence I walk to the podium, the women in the audience pricing my outfit from the feet up. “She’s fatter than her photograph,” I hear one murmur. An expectant silence falls. I look out upon a sea of faces. Who are these people? Why am I here? I glance at my carefully prepared notes which have transmuted into illegible Sanskrit. My mind is wiped clean as a well-erased blackboard. “Ladies and gentlemen…” I begin.

Well, they clapped and were complimentary. Occasionally I’m buttonholed afterwards by a random well-lubricated gentleman who’s “done a bit of this public speaking lark” himself and kindly offers me tips on how I might “spice things up”. Home – hurling off the hurty shoes and making the firm resolution, “Never again.” Until the next time.

I fell into this lark years ago by accidentally attending the local Debating Society. Within a month I was on my feet defending Margaret Thatcher’s sinking of the ‘Belgrano’. The motion was soundly defeated, but I went down with all guns blazing, fully inoculated with the needle of contention. I remember as fifth-formers, we were forbidden to form a debating society at my convent grammar school, (probably because the idea originated with the daughter of a prominent trade unionist.) Our time had not yet come.

In an era when good communicative skills are key, many of our young people are abysmally inarticulate. As an adjudicator of public speaking I often have to write, ‘content excellent; delivery lacks polish’. The voice is an instrument and many of ours are sadly out of tune. Typically, Norn Iron citizens speak without moving their lips, mangling grammar and strangling diction. In a formal setting it’s not a betrayal of your origins to speak clearly and grammatically with correct pronunciation, emphasis and inflection so you can be properly understood. You can ‘Aye’ or ‘Naw’ in privacy, but not if you want to thrive professionally or in business.

We export too many of our brightest and best out of the country unpolished. One student first-terming at an English university said, “Me house-mits cannae unnerstan’ whit A’m sayin’.” Be proud to carry in your mouth the music of your own place, but re-tune your recital for the ears of your audience.

Tha’s all for this wik. Tik good kerra yersels….