Northern Ireland

Carmel Quinn: 'This is about a principle, recognising the hurt put on us and our community'

Carmel Quinn's brother John Laverty was shot dead in west Belfast in 1971
Carmel Quinn's brother John Laverty was shot dead in west Belfast in 1971 Carmel Quinn's brother John Laverty was shot dead in west Belfast in 1971

CARMEL Quinn was the youngest of 12 children, the baby of a huge west Belfast family who all doted on her, but her childhood was cut short when her brother John Laverty was shot dead during what would become known as the Ballymurphy massacre.

It was August 1971 when Northern Ireland took a turn into the abyss with the introduction of internment without trial.

"I remember the atmosphere was awful, mummy and daddy constantly gathered around the radio with worried looks on their faces," said Carmel.

"The people of Ballymurphy got together and decided to get a lot of us away out of the area but my mummy wouldn't go, so my sister and took me and my other sister.

"It was our John brought us to the community centre. I remember I was crying after my mummy, I was very attached to her. He said to me, 'You're just going on a wee holiday'.

"I sat at the back of the bus waving until I couldn't see him any more. I obviously didn't know I'd never see him again."

After her brother was shot dead, Carmel and her sisters returned to Ballymurphy.

"From then on it wasn't a normal childhood, we lived in a war zone," she said.

"I didn't start back to school until that October and was brought to the graveyard by my mummy every day, rain, hail or snow, and then to Mass every night.

"I even slept beside her. I was her comfort - she used to say 'If I hadn't had you I don't know where I would have been'."

An inquest examining the deaths of 10 people, including John Laverty, concluded public hearings in March in this year, with the findings yet to be delivered.

However, Carmel and others who lost loved ones but did not witness the killings will not benefit from a planned pension for Troubles victims.

"Our past is so complex, and yet the British state try and put it in a tidy box - 'You stand over there because you never witnessed it, so you don't feel as bad as that person'," she said.

"My sister's husband witnessed a murder, so he's entitled to apply for the pension, but my sister who lost her brother isn't.

"My life could have been so different. My children were wrapped in cotton wool, I couldn't enjoy them because I was always so worried something was going to happen.

"I'm a grandmother now, I look at my own son and wonder how my mother coped. My daddy died at 60 of a broken heart.

"People see me and probably think 'she looks ok', but you should be inside my head some days.

"For them to say, 'So your brother was murdered, but you didn't see it so it didn't effect you' is cruel.

"More then that, I'm tired fighting, we've to fight for every single thing, every crumb from the table.

"It was never about money. What happened to my family is irreparable, it's about them (British state) taking responsibility for what they did.

"They can't give us back our John, or give me back my childhood, but this is about a principle, recognising the hurt put on us and our community."