Anthony Scaramucci’s swift exit from the White House after a 10-day spell as communications director has got people musing about the shortest amount of time they’ve kept a job for.
When sports writer Nubyjas Wilborn asked Twitter users to spill the deets on their shortest CV entry, almost 2,000 people came forward with tales of strife.
In honor of Anthony Scaramucci, what's the shortest amount of time you've spent on a job and why?
— Nubyjas Wilborn (@nwilborn19) July 31, 2017
The responses did not disappoint – from being intimidated by an armed five-year-old on a babysitting gig, to squirting dish soap in the manager’s tea, here are some absolute zingers.
What was supposed to be a regular babysitting gig turned into a 1 time thing when the 5 y/o threatened me w a knife.
— Jamie Kenney (@LaComtesseJamie) July 31, 2017
Slipped in the ice on my first day of trying to flog direct debits to OAPs. Got trapped in a minivan on the same day. Left after a week. https://t.co/am2AivH9oA
— Dan McDaid (@danmcdaid) August 1, 2017
One week at a pizza place, showed up for work, it had burnt down and nobody called me. 🍕🔥 https://t.co/fJOEZTsNRL
— Paulina Ganucheau (@PlinaGanucheau) August 1, 2017
One day working at the V&A museum when I was 15. I managed to push a trolley full of dirty dishes into an ancient Roman mosaic. https://t.co/3oRYNIjQ8q
— Tiernan Douieb (@TiernanDouieb) July 31, 2017
One day building a McDonalds. One of the McBosses told me to clean some stairs with a toothbrush. I politely refused.
— Russ Litten (@RussLitten) July 31, 2017
Two nights at a parcelforce depot. I didn't have the muscles to lift the parcels from the trucks onto the rollers. Not my finest hour. https://t.co/6VxScE6xIP
— Jack Thorne (@jackthorne) July 31, 2017
Ok so to be fair to Mooch, I was fired by a fruit market on my first day of work because I couldn't remember the code for bananas. I was 19. https://t.co/Z0H7XjWNYu
— Beisan Zubi (@beisan) July 31, 2017
a week at Burger King when I was 18. They didn't allow us to have acrylic nails and I didn't need that kind of negativity in my life. https://t.co/4mSKTC4kVZ
— Geminist (@UrbanGem) July 31, 2017
Fair enough.
Labour MPs Jess Phillips and Stella Creasy put in their two cents.
I was a silver service waitress for 1 hour at the Royal Armouries Museum in Leeds. Turns out those trays are hot and are easy to drop. https://t.co/1cl52HXm1B
— Jess Phillips (@jessphillips) August 1, 2017
Temping as a receptionist. Hardcore misogyny so I put washing up liquid in their tea, explained blonde didn’t mean dumb and didn’t go back! https://t.co/sDubppC4fY
— stellacreasy (@stellacreasy) August 1, 2017
Some never even made it to day one.
Was driving to first day on the job…they phoned to say I'd been laid off… 🤦🏻♀️ @warriors_mom https://t.co/3ZmA3f7I8G
— Tamara Davis 🍀 (@warriors_mom) August 1, 2017
got so drunk at the club the night before I started a new job that I forgot I had a job https://t.co/Pl1DNQivMr
— Jayson Musson (@therealhennessy) August 1, 2017
We’ve all got to start somewhere.
I sold perfumes door to door in San Diego for 1 day. Felt like my college degree was worth more than that.
— Scott Michaux (@ScottMichaux) July 31, 2017
HMRC missed the trick here – they should have hired this guy.
2 hours as a temp at Whitehall HQ of HMRC. Employed for a week to assist incumbent permanent employee with data entry…
— Naveen Cavale (@plasreconsurg) July 31, 2017
Picked up a pile of CVs from bosses desk, on arrival…
— Naveen Cavale (@plasreconsurg) July 31, 2017
Sat down, entered all the data into the PC
— Naveen Cavale (@plasreconsurg) July 31, 2017
Returned to bosses office to get the next pile, at which point he got a calculator out and started doing some sums
— Naveen Cavale (@plasreconsurg) July 31, 2017
Then said that that was the entire pile for which I had been employed for the week
— Naveen Cavale (@plasreconsurg) July 31, 2017
Then he told me I was working 48 times the speed of the permanent person. And by doing so, had done myself out of a job.
— Naveen Cavale (@plasreconsurg) July 31, 2017
Scaramucci was fired from his post on August 31, 10 days after he took on his communications director job.
He was dismissed by new chief of staff John Kelly, amid continuing tensions within Donald Trump’s cabinet. His firing also comes after he launched a sweary rant against former chief of staff Reince Priebus, last week.
