GREGG Wallace, MasterChef judge and collector of wives, has been nattering about his home life of late due to the fact he and his wife have welcomed a baby and a recipe book into the world within the space of six weeks.
Gregg is Sleb Safari’s favourite MasterChef presenter and it’s basing that on having met John Torode.
At age 54 Gregg has already racked up four wives. Quite the feat you’ll agree. That’s one for every decade since turning 20. And he met two of them on Twitter.
Gregg lives in Kent with his fourth wife, Anna, their newborn, Sid, and Anna’s parents. His in-laws are an Italian family who love to cook.
“At the end of today I’ll go home and there’ll be a bottle of white wine chilling, an enormous pot of minestrone on the side and a great big mound of grated Parmesan,” he told The Times recently.
“I don’t know who wouldn’t want that. My home life is luxurious, the food is incredible.”
Make up the spare room Gregg; Sleb Safari will be there on the next flight.
Anna and Gregg met after she contacted him on Twitter to ask his thoughts on cooking rhubarb with duck. The saucy minx.
“I was attracted to her picture and then as we began talking about food I grew more attracted to her,” Gregg explained.
“We spoke every night on the phone for nearly a fortnight before we met for dinner at Heston's restaurant at the Mandarin Oriental.”
Coincidentally he met his third wife via Twitter when she enquired about celery. It’s true; the way to a man’s heart is through his vegetable patch.
Gregg seems a touch sensitive about the whole Twitter as Tinder malarkey.
“Well, how do you meet people without social media? When I was younger we went to discos, but they don’t exist any more.”
Now happily ensconced with Anna, Sid, Anna’s mum and Anna’s dad, Gregg has decided to tweet less, Instagram more.
“I may have met two of my wives on Twitter, but I don’t want to meet any more.”
Always good to clarify things Gregg, always good.
Disappointingly Gregg and Anna’s book is called Gregg’s Italian Family Cookbook despite it being filled with recipes from Anna and her family. Her name appears in much smaller font on the front.
“Actually, most of the book is Anna’s work, but nobody knows who Anna is, so the publishers felt it should be our book,” he told The Times.
Sleb Safari dearly hopes Anna has at least snuck in the duck à la rhubarbe recipe.
Madonna prefers her light to yours
There’s a profile of Madonna in the New York Times Magazine by Vanessa Grigoriadis which Sleb Safari greatly enjoyed but which Madonna took exception to.
Sleb Safari was very taken with the description of Madonna backstage at an awards ceremony where she was honoured for her work supporting the LGBT community.
“After her speech, Madonna made her way to a modified red carpet, set up just for her in a private room. Her dedicated social media photographer documented everything, and her personal hair and make-up folks bowed over her like art conservators touching up a priceless painting. She even had her own lighting specialists, who monitored news outlets’ lighting apparatuses for shadows and bathed her in pure white light.”
A dedicated hair and make-up crew is nothing new. A social media photographer isn’t a huge leap. But all that plus a team of lighting specialists? That is next level.
How do any celebrities manage to remain angst-free?
Madonna's children will soon reliase the error of their ways
BACK to Madonna who has told Graham Norton that it would be easier on her six children if their mother had a more straightforward job.
Speaking on the Graham Norton Show Madge said: “I think they wish I wasn’t Madonna. I think it would be less challenging in their minds if they didn’t have me as their mother.”
Madonna, take heart. No-one's parents are cool when you're a teenager but once they've grown up they'll realise their mum is frickin' Madonna.
Social Media Smut
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