I MARRIED my husband when I was 18. I thought I loved him, but I know now it was in order to get away from my parents.
We've got three children and I realise I've got nothing in common with him at all. We fight and argue all the time about money, the children or our home – everything. They all leave me feeling miserable and I know marriage doesn't have to be like this.
My sister's married to a lovely man and they are so happy together – it makes me realise what I am missing. Do you think I should leave my husband?
He is good with the children and works hard, but do I have to put up with a loveless marriage until our children are grown up?
WS
FIONA SAYS: You were quite young when you married and a lot has happened since then – not least of which is a young family to care for.
People change so much between the ages of 18 and 25 as do their plans and hopes for the future – so it's no wonder than many young marriages fail.
However, some succeed, and yours could too if you gave yourself another chance and tried to work out your differences with your husband.
You thought you loved him once so, for your children's sake, couldn't you try again?
If you could re-establish the connection you once had between you then there's a chance. Think back to what it was that made you both happy and try to find ways to bring this back into your marriage.
Counselling with Relate (relate.org.uk) could help you to get this process started.
MY SON WANTS TO LEAVE HOME
MY son's 22 and when he was home from college for Christmas he told us that, when he finishes this summer, he'll be leaving and moving into a flat with some friends.
His elder brother (my other son) got married and left home just a few months ago, so the thought of losing them both so close together is breaking my heart. We've always been such a close family and I know my husband and I will miss him terribly.
I want to try to persuade him to stay, but my husband says I should let him go.
TS
FIONA SAYS: I don't know your son, so it's impossible for me to know what might persuade him to stay, but I'm not sure you should be trying to stop him anyway.
Sooner or later he will want to leave home, so let him go freely.
If you try and force him to stay, he will become resentful and when he eventually does go, he'll be less willing to come back and visit you.
When your children grow up and leave home, it is a very scary time and perhaps the best thing is to be honest and admit how sad you feel. Share your feelings with your husband and perhaps your son; talk to friends who are in the same position.
I am sure you'll see you're not alone in feeling like this, but try to fill the void left by your children by making new friends and developing other interests. You must have something you have always wanted to do - but perhaps have been stopped from doing so because you had a family to look after.
Now's the time to explore such dreams and ambitions.
WILL MY DAUGHTER'S HOLIDAY ROMANCE LAST?
ON a skiing holiday in Canada last year, my daughter met a young man, a ski instructor, with whom she fell in love.
I gather they had a great time together and have been Skyping and emailing since.
She is planning to go back and see him in a few weeks' time and she's so excited and can't wait to get back there.
I want her to be happy, but I'm worried she'll be let down; I'm sure he gets to see thousands of other young women.
Do holiday romances ever work out? Should I try and prepare her for possible disappointment, or will that make me seem like a killjoy?
WL
FIONA SAYS: Years ago, without Skye and email, I would have been much more cautious about this.
Not all holiday romances end in disaster, but the fact they've been able to talk to one another, face to face, gives them a better chance, I think, than holiday romances did in years gone by.
I think your daughter should try and be realistic though. Although they've been in regular contact, they don't really know each other and, when they meet again, they may find they feel differently. I don't think there's any harm in pointing this out, but I wouldn't labour the point.
I'd encourage her to enjoy her holiday, whatever happens, and encourage her to take sensible precautions just in case she feels differently. After that, you'll just have to leave her to make her own judgements and decisions.
HOW CAN I HELP MY ASTHMATIC BOYFRIEND?
MY boyfriend has never been terribly fit but, after nagging from me, he finally saw a doctor and has found out he's asthmatic.
He's been advised to start using an inhaler, but he won't.
It's like he's hoping it will just go away if he ignores it, but I think he should be finding out about asthma and taking steps to control it, so it doesn't control him. When I try to talk to him about it, he just gets angry and tells me to mind my own business.
I don't understand what's wrong with him. He must know by now that I love him and so, obviously, I want him to be well.
BS
FIONA SAYS: I wonder if he's one of those men who see any illness as a sign of weakness. It might explain why he's trying to ignore his asthma.
He might also be afraid that if he acknowledges there's something wrong with him, you might lose interest in him. Whatever his thinking, you're quite right that the responsible, sensible thing is to start treatment.
Might it encourage him if he knew that a number of elite athletes have asthma, and it's because of their asthma treatment they are able to compete?
David Beckham, Paul Scholes, Bradley Wiggins, together with 25 per cent of the 2012 Team GB athletics squad all have asthma. Some maintain it is getting over the asthma that's made them so competitive.
For many people, perhaps like your boyfriend, exercise can trigger their condition. With proper training and medicine though, people with exercise-induced asthma can take part in any sport they choose.
There probably isn't much more you can do other than give him the facts and let him know that you love him, of course.
