ANOTHER week, another bonkers slice of healthy eating advice from celebrity lifestyle guru Gwyneth Paltrow.
This week it’s a breakfast smoothie made with Sex Dust that comes in a 56g jar costing £42 a pop.
The internet lost its mind when Gwyneth shared her favourite smoothie recipe but Sleb Safari doesn’t see what all the fuss is about, probably because it’s a big fan of the dust.
Every morning, without fail, come hail or shine, Sleb Safari has a sprinkling of house dust in its breakfast cuppa.
Sex Dust is just one of many different moon dusts produced by the Moon Juice company. Please lower your eyebrows, that looks is most unbecoming.
The range includes Spirit Dust which gets your “extrasensory perception going” while Sex Dust “is designed to stimulate and cultivate sexual flow in both men and women… send sensitivity and power to all the right places, supporting primordial energy and vital essence”.
Brain Dust, meanwhile, sets you up for a busy day in the office, which is ironic because sometimes after a particularly busy day in the office Sleb Safari feels as though its brain has been ground down to dust.
The Moon Juice company was set up by a lady called Amanda Chantal Bacon who has obviously spent enough time with slebs to know that they’ll splash the cash on anything that promises to make them glow from within for longer.
Or, in Gwyneth’s words the company is “a cosmic beacon for those seeking out beauty, wellness and longevity” which sells “miraculous lifestyle tools”.
Clearly high on a pinch of their own dust Moon Juice last week encouraged fans to build a shrine to their products.
“Create a simple altar to honour them out in the open to encourage sprinkling, nibbling and blending with whimsy of the spices, herbs and petals”.
Gwyneth shared her breakfast smoothie recipe on her much-maligned but endlessly entertaining lifestyle website goop. It goes a little something like this:
Ingredients:
1 cup almond milk
1 tablespoon almond butter
1 teaspoon coconut oil
2 tablespoons vanilla mushroom protein powder
1 teaspoon maca
1 teaspoon ashwagandha
1 teaspoon ho shou wu
1 teaspoon cordyceps
1 teaspoon moon dust of choice: Action Dust to soothe overworked muscles, Beauty Dust for a glowy complexion and healthy hair, Brain Dust to combat mental fogginess, Goodnight Dust when sleep has been evasive, Sex Dust, for, you know, and Spirit Dust to get that extrasensory perception going.
pinch Himalayan sea salt
pinch vanilla powder (optional)
Never mind the moon dust – where can you source the other ingredients? Sleb Safari will stick with its House Dust Brew for now.
Rihanna And Her Bedazzled Underwear
AND so to Rihanna who has let slip that her biggest regret in life is not having worn bedazzled underwear to an awards night.
In her inimitable style Rihanna wore a Swarovski-encrusted fishnet dress to the 2014 Council of Fashion Designers of America that didn’t allow for much in the way of undergarments, save a thong.
Rihanna told Vogue that her choice of plain, rather than “bedazzled” underwear, was “the only regret I have in my life”.
Sleb Safari suspects you’ve had somewhat of a charmed life when that’s your greatest regret.
Competition Time
SOME people like to mark the beginning of spring with an industrial grade cleaning of their home. Others, Sleb Safari included, prefer the scent of aromatherapy oils to bleach. Either way, you're all welcome to enter this week's competition to win a Spring Awakening Spa Experience for two at the Slieve Donard Resort and Spa.
The spring awakening package includes:
ESPA brightening facial
Oriental scalp massage
Marma point hand massage
Marma point foot massage
The treatment duration is one hour 20 minutes and you'll be provided with a robe, slippers and towels as well as a delicious light lunch in the juice bar and full use of the spa facilities. The spa experience costs £110 Monday to Friday and a £30 supplement applies for Saturday and Sunday.
To be in with a chance to win answer the following question correctly:
In which county is the Slieve Donard Resort and Spa located?
Email your answer to competitions@irishnews.com by noon on Wednesday March 23 and please include your contact details. Usual Irish News rules apply and the prize is subject to availability.
For more information on the spring awakening package call the spa at The Slieve Donard on 028 4372 6166. For more information on Hastings Hotels go to www.hastingshotels.com.
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