Life

Radio review: You and Yours examines middle-aged blues

Nuala McCann

Nuala McCann

Nuala McCann is an Irish News columnist and writes a weekly radio review.

Nuala McCann
Nuala McCann Nuala McCann

You and Yours Radio 4

What has made you miserable in middle age and how do you tackle it?

It’s sobering to think that those aged 45 to 54 are at the most unhappy period of life. It’s when people are grappling with their own inner Victor Meldrews.

The conversation was about a recent report from the Office of National Statistics that suggests we are at our most miserable during our middle years. Young people and the over 65s are happier, the results suggest.

The empty nest had a role in it. One caller Andrew broke down in tears as he talked about his son and daughter leaving home. All the earlier years were about gain, he said, and now it was about loss.

“You work all through their childhood to encourage them to be successful and see the world and get good jobs... but now what?” he asked. “You are left in limbo land.”

Elderly parents’ decline and regular visits to doctors, hospitals was another theme.

But people out there coping by are getting out of their comfort zones. A man said his self help remedy was a road bike and a ukulele.

Mags from Dublin looked after two parents in their 90s. So she took up making pottery and stand-up comedy in a wheelchair to challenge people’s prejudices... so it’s really sit down comedy.

“If you wanna get ignored get a wheelchair or get old, you just blend into the background,” she said.

A woman caller said that in your 50s you are suddenly invisible... and it happens almost overnight.

“That was quite shocking,” she said.

There was misery a-plenty but it was heartening to hear how people dealt with the blues.

Put in a real fire said someone; no wheat, sugar, alcohol or coffee said another; buy a horse said a third.

Bob found himself a brand new interest, he bought a ukulele. It certainly cheered him up ... but it made his wife very unhappy.