REPORTS of excessive celebrity behaviour in a Belgravia sushi restaurant have reached Sleb Safari’s ears.
Sinitta, long-term friend and former love of Simon Cowell, had gone to the restaurant for what are being described as ‘clear the air talks’ with a ‘star’ of reality TV show Real Housewives of Cheshire.
Wait, you didn’t think these women had gone to eat did you? Have you learned nothing?
Sinitta was meeting businesswoman Dawn Ward who is one of six women who has put her life on display for the viewing pleasure of the great unwashed.
Real Housewives of Cheshire is, as the name suggests, the kind of show that’s as worthwhile as typhoid and twice as hard to recover from.
Sadly no peace accord was reached in that sushi restaurant. Instead, Sinitta was allegedly attacked with a napkin. And no that isn’t some kind of monster Japanese crustacean.
Real housewife Dawn has been charged with assault after allegedly shoving Sinitta and throwing the napkin at her.
Never again will Sleb Safari muck about with its napkin while out for dinner.
Dawn appeared in court last week charged with the offence and a date has been set for trial next year. She denies the charge.
The prosecution said the ladies had agreed to meet because Sinitta wanted to clear the air over some rumours and an argument ensued but no-one was injured during the making of the unsuccessful peace talks.
There has been a second, excessive display of celebrity behaviour in a separate location which Sleb Safari feels duty bound to share with you.
The brouhaha occurred in Elstree Studios on the set of the Celebrity Big Brother discussion show Celebrity Big Brother’s Bit On The Side, or CBB’s CBBBOTS for short.
Peace talks were definitely not on the agenda when a group of panellists met to discuss the antics of other low-level figures from the world of entertainment.
On the panel were former model and former CBB contestant Janice Dickinson, former Big Brother contestant Aisleyne Horgan-Wallace, former porn star Jenna Jameson, former Teen Mom star and former Celebrity Big Brother contestant Farrah Abraham and former ’Allo ’Allo! star and former I’m a Celebrity contestant Vicki Michelle.
Sleb Safari hopes you’re keeping up. Basically the glue that binds these CBBBOTS panellists is reality television and increasing irrelevancy.
As their un-peaceful talks drew to a close Vicki Michelle was hit on the head by a flying champagne glass and has made a complaint to police.
Sleb Safari really, really hopes the copper who spoke to Vicki opened the conversation with 'Allo 'Allo..
DR MCDREAMY IS A DEFINITE FOR BRIDGET JONES' BABY
PATRICK Dempsey, familiar to all Grey’s Anatomy fans as Dr McDreamy, has confirmed he’s taking part in the third Bridget Jones film.
The actor Intsagrammed a picture of himself outside Pinewood Studios and namechecked Renee Zellweger and Colin Firth.
"Nice to be working in England. Renee and Colin are an absolute joy to work with! A good couple of days rehearsing at Pinewood Studios. I really like it here!"
Glad someone told him to pack an umbrella.
SUPERMODEL CLOSES AIR TRAFFIC
SLEB Safari has to hand it to Israeli supermodel Bar Refaeli – the girl has taken wedding planning to a whole new level.
Being somewhat photogenic, Bar feared paparazzi would stop at nothing to get photos of her wedding day so she and her fiancé asked that airspace above the venue be shut down and the Civil Aviation Authority has acquiesced.
The country’s transport minister hasn’t taken it well. He’s reported to have said: “The skies belong to the entire public and exclusivity cannot be granted for commercial reasons for high-profile people”.
Local media have reported that the couple are planning to have two helicopters, an observation balloon and a handful of drones on the go and it seems the Civil Aviation Authority thought that was quite enough without adding commercial aircraft to the mix.
Bravo Bar, your attention to detail is unrivalled and Sleb Safari cannot wait to see what you’ve done with the seating plan.
SOCIAL MEDIA WATCH
Actress Kerry Washington is crushing on the Pope
Pope Francis might be my celebrity crush. #ImNotEvenCatholic https://t.co/P9rqTFtj71
— kerry washington (@kerrywashington) September 23, 2015
