TIME TO get the driving gloves and the car coat on, foot to the floor, it’s another Bluffer’s Guide to Irish.
One of the consequences of Coronavirus is the relative lack of cars on the road.
You can say carrana or gluaisteáin for cars. Or automobiles.
Is maith liom a bheith ag tiomáint - I like driving is a sentence you will hear from petrol heads, men and women, whether it is a testosterone-laden carr spóirt - sports car or a common or garden Hyundai for the school run.
People love their cars for many reasons.
An dath - the colour, an dóigh a dtógann sé coirnéal - the way it takes a corner, an cumhdach - the upholstery.
The Bluffer used to own a yellow Ford Capri with a black vinyl roof.
Sex on alloy wheels. (Aye, dream on!)
Ba é Karl Benz a chéadcheap an gluaisteán - it was Karl Benz who invented the motor car but he could hardly have dreamt of how his brainchild would have transformed society – for the better and for the worse.
Despite the trualliú - pollution that cars create, the number of deaths it causes, the cost of running the damned things, so many people prize their cars more than they do their spouses.
To drive a car, you need to know about the parts.
Inside the car, is the roth stiúrtha - the driving wheel (think of Rod Stewart) and the giarluamhán - the gearstick.
Cuireann tú an eochar san inneall - you put the key in the ignition and suddenly Steppenwolf are blasting Born To Be Wild.
You might just be going to the shop for some Jaffa cakes and a pint of milk, but you feel like you are on Route 66 or having fun, fun, fun on the Autobahn.
Speaking of which, if you ever find yourself driving on Germany’s motorways, remember that they often have no speed limits but tá sé in éadan an dlí - it is against the law to run out of fuel and you could incur a big fine if you run out of petrol.
The Germans also come down heavily on anyone displaying buile bhóthair - road rage so keep cool and think of beaches in Donegal and don’t be giving the fingers to Herr Mercedes when he cuts into your lane.
Ná bí ag caitheamh cluaisíní - don’t be wearing earphones if you are driving in France - it isn’t allowed. Whether you are listening to Edith Piaf or talking to your mother, it doesn’t matter.
Staying in France, it’s the driver’s responsibility to carry a device that’s capable of checking their blood alcohol content, ie an anáileadán - breathalyser, for safety purposes understandably.
If you are planning to drive on the Iberian Peninsula or in the Swiss Alps post-Covid-19, you are required by law to ensure they always have a spare pair of glasses in the car, if you require glasses whilst driving.
Cypriot road rules specifically prohibit drivers from eating or drinking anything while they’re behind the wheel – so no cheese and onion ceapairí - sandwiches! – while to protect vulnerable plants and wildlife, Icelandic law prohibits off-road driving and the Greeks won’t let you smoke in your car.
CÚPLA FOCAL
carrana(carana) - cars
gluaisteáin(glooishtyaan) - cars
Is maith liom a bheith ag tiomáint(iss myh lum a vay eg chumantch) - I like driving
carr spóirt(car sportch) - sports car
an dath(un dah) - the colour
an dóigh a dtógann sé coirnéal(un doey a doegan shay cornyaal) - the way it takes a corner
an cumhdach(un coodakh) - the upholstery
Ba é Karl Benz a chéadcheap an gluaisteán (ba yay carl bents a caydkyap un glooishtaan) - it was Karl Benz who invented the motor car
trualliú (trooilyoo) - pollution
roth stiúrtha(rawh shtyoorha) - the driving wheel
giarluamhán(geerlooawaan) - the gearstick
Cuireann tú an eochar san inneall(keran too un yokhar san inyill) - you put the key in the ignition
tá sé in éadan an dlí(taa shay in aydan un jlee) - it is against the law
buile bhóthair(bwilye woe-her) - road rage
Ná bí ag caitheamh cluaisíní(naa bee eg kyhoo clooisheenee) - don’t be wearing earphones
anáileadán(anaalaydaan) - a breathalyser
ceapairí(kyaperee) - sandwiches