GOOD DAY to you all, or konnichiwa as they say in the land of the Rising Sun, isn’t it another Bluffer’s Guide to Irish.
Yes, the Bluffer was up at the bodhránacht an lae - the scrake of dawn yesterday to watch Ireland’s first match in Corn an Domhain sa Rugbaí - the Rugby World Cup. Good craic, wasn’t it?
27-3 against people who spell whiskey with an e was a good result in a first game and reading Scottish fans reaction on twitter was hilarious.
Now, the Bluffer isn’t going to pretend he understands the intricacies of rugby union.
Ní thuigim na rialacha - I don’t understand the rules is what most people say but of course that doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy watching the game.
You don’t need to know the difference between a cúltosaí oscailte - an openside flanker and a frapa ceann teannta - tight head to enjoy the game.
You do need to know that scoring an úd - a try is the main purpose of rugby. The Bluffer has no idea where the word úd comes from but hey!
You get cúig phointe - five points for scoring a try you also get a slánú - a conversion which gives you another two points.
You can get a cic pionóis - a penalty for three points and a dropchic - dropkick will also give you three points.
There are other important rugby words to be learned if you want to enjoy the games as Gaeilge.
Like clibirt - a scrum which is when the eight forwards from each side crouch and push against each other.
The ball is thrown down a channel between them and when the ball comes out, the scrum half kicks it and then everyone charges after it.
In the millisecond the Bluffer saw himself as a rugby star, he was a leathchúlaí clibirte - a scrum half, the guy who connects the cúlaithe - backs with the tosaithe - forwards but the thought of a stampede of 18-stone, square-jawed, all-muscle, rugby types charging at him with fire and fury in their eyes put him right off the idea.
Because of “rights issues,” the Bluffer was forced to watch the game on ITV but he was impressed by the station’s attempt to explain the síneadh amach - the line-out.
More of that please, although the Bluffer was more fríd a chéile - confused than he was before.
An that’s despite him watching the game while eating brachán agus mil - porridge with honey and drinking mint tea - not the usual beverage for watching the rugger!
Games are usually accompanied by prodigious amounts of alcohol, leading to boozy conversations about the efficacy of Ireland’s Call as the Irish team’s “amhrán náisiúnta - national anthem”; whether rugby was a cluiche gallda - a foreign sport redolent of the garrison and how it wouldn’t hold a candle to iománaíocht - hurling.
The latter is true but when rugby is played as expansively as it can be, it was wonderful to watch.
Ireland should see off the other teams in the group and head into the quarter finals, levels of excitement rising to such a fever pitch that Dana winning Eurovision will be seen as a mere damp squib.
Ireland. I-erland. Oops.
CÚPLA FOCAL
bodhránacht an lae(boeranakht un lay) - the scrake of dawn
Corn an Domhain sa Rugbaí (corn un dowan sa rugbee) - the Rugby World Cup
ní thuigim na rialacha (hee higim na reealaha) - I don’t understand the rules
cúltosaí oscailte
(cool-tosee uscaltcha) - an openside flanker
frapa ceann teannta(frapa kyun chanta) - a tight head prop
úd (ood) - a try
cúig phointe(coo-ig fwintcha) - five points
slánú(slaanoo) - a conversion
cic pionóis(kik pinoshe) - a penalty dropchic(dropkik) - dropkick
clibirt(clibirtch) - a scrum
leathchúlaí clibirte(leh-khoole clibirtcha) - a scrum half
cúlaithe(cooleeha) - backs
tosaithe(tusseeha) - forwards
síneadh amach (sheenyoo amakh) - the line-out
amhrán náisiúnta(oraan naashoonta) - national anthem
fríd a chéile(freege a cayla) - confused
amhrán náisiúnta(oreaan naashoonta) - national anthem
cluiche gallda(cleeha galda) - a game sport
iománaíocht(umaneeakht) - hurling
brachán agus mil (brakhaan agis mill) - porridge with honey