AS ONE of the main men behind the famed Bard of Armagh Festival of Humorous Verse, you would expect that John Makem would have a long, witty and poetic speech well rehearsed for his daughter's wedding tomorrow.
But no, Makem is planning to go 'freestyle' as he waxes lyrical about his eldest daughter Sarah after she marries her Galway groom David.
“I’ll make the speech up as I go along,” he says. “Any time I’m asked to speak, what comes out comes out and it’s usually not too bad. I’ll have a few pointers and one thing will lead to another.”
You could say that one thing led to another after the Bard of Armagh festival started as a small event in Keady in 1995. Now, ahead of its 21st instalment at the Armagh City Hotel on November 20, it's a fixture in the literary calendar with 15 finalists vying for the prestigious title – won last year by Seamus Carolan.
Competitors and spectators of all ages come from all parts of Ireland north and south. And there's even one finalist from Cornwall this year – Rob Barratt.
“Rob is marvellous and he’s done a great entry for this year; it’s full of puns. He’s got a fantastic style of presentation. The audiences love him and he’s definitely a frontrunner. As is Peter Casey from Co Clare,” says Armagh man Makem.
The budding Bards will present a wide range of entries in what Makem and his fellow organisers call “the ancient art of humorous versification”. Among the titles this year are 'From Russia with Spuds' and “'The King of the Culchies', while one entry is said to take inspiration from Fifty Shades of Grey.
Co Armagh man Donal McKenna's entry 'The Special Presentation' concerns “the art of lying” and features the lines, “He had lied all over Ireland, wherever liars could be found/ Now I know he’s happy, for he’s lying underground”.
John Makem explains the parameters the finalists have to follow and the wide range of humorous subject matters that gets covered.
“They all just dig down into their imagination and they grab something or something grabs them and they mould it into verse. All sorts of themes come up – battered husbands, smuggling diesel, the fact that there’s no 'new’ news.
“Some people write their best thing on their first go and can’t get back to that high standard. But Jimmy Rafferty from Loughgall comes up with something extraordinary every year; I don’t know how he does it.
“When we started it there was no time limit so you’d have some people with short poems and some with big long 15-minute poems. After a couple of years the long poems started to be padded out; people would get their punchline in early and then they’d lose the audience. So now they have to be up to 650 words or up to nine minutes.”
As the main organiser, Makem says he wants the 21st Bard festival to be extra-special.
“We’re hoping to push the boat out and celebrate it a bit more. It’s always a great event and it always sells really well,” he says. “But it doesn’t happen by accident; you have to work at it and I’d spend the guts of the year working at it. You have to network with new writers and create an awareness of what the Bard’s about, because it is a unique event. There’s no festival of humorous verse like it.
“A few people have tried [to emulate it] but they fell flat on their faces. I think they felt it would just happen but it doesn’t happen without the work. We’ve all sorts of age groups and people come from all over Ireland coming along. You’d get 17 and 18-year-olds up to people in their 80s. It’s thoroughly enjoyable.”
The winner gets the coveted Bard trophy, while prize money of £3,000 is shared out between the finalists.
“It’s not the money they’re worried about, it’s the achievement of being top dog,” says Makem.
It might seem that the festival is dominated by men, but there are four women vying for the title this year.
“We’ve never had a female winner, which is the one downside. But they’ve been very close,” says Makem. “There are a few good ones this year. Some of them would say that men can get away with humour that women wouldn’t get away with. But we’ve had some outstanding women over the years, including Joan Gaffney, Mary Byrne and the late Rosemary Twohig.”
This year's event will see former Bard of Armagh Henry McGrath – from Katesbridge in Co Down – being honoured with ‘The Gerry Watters Hall of Fame’ award. The Hall of Fame – which includes Seamus Carolan, Marie McCartan, Pat McGeeney, Patsy O’Hagan, Michael Quinn and Jimmy Rafferty – is named after the late Gerry Watters, a former festival committee member.
Makem is hoping for a capacity crowd of 1,000 on November 20 and he's happy to see how the event has grown over the years.
“It started in Keady in1995 and even then there was an energy about it. I decided to work on it and I did and now it’s hugely successful.”
Speaking to The Irish News on Tuesday, Makem was busy balancing preparations for both the Bard night and his daughter's wedding day. So if his wedding speech goes well, might he decide to read it out again at the Bard festival?
“No, I don’t think so. In the early days of the Bard I was running around on the night like a blue-arsed fly, but these last few years I’ve thought `I’ve done my work and now I can sit down and fold my arms and enjoy the night’ and that’s what I do. I just soak it all up. And I really really enjoy it.”
:: The 21st Bard of Armagh festival takes place at the Armagh City Hotel on Friday November 20 at 8pm. For information and tickets, visit www.bardofarmagh.com. See Saturday’s Irish News for a competition to win tickets and accommodation at the Armagh City Hotel.
